I remember those days when I would be able to just sit down and clearly type/think/write and even just possibly ponder about the world, my life and the things happening around me. These days it’s all about routine. Baby wake up, gotta feed baby, take care of baby, clean the house and try to get some work done..then clean baby, feed baby, watch baby and clean the house possibly repeated again during the day. Thanks goodness I have an amazing husband that helps me around the house…else I don’t know what I would do.
I now understand why mom have such add and can’t do one thing at a time or ever focus on a conversation when baby is around …it’s just impossible…and especially if you’re a breast feeding mom you’re just thinking the whole time …i need to go pump…omg my breast hurts…when is this conversation going to be over…it’s not as if you don’t want to talk to them…it’s because you physically can’t think about anything but how much your boob hurts. Being a mom really changes you….physically and mentally. I want to take care of myself and I try to but lately I’m just lucky I can take a shower and have clean clothes on. Forget about plucking my eye brows or curling/straightening my hair.
It’s her bedtime. She sleeps late. So that doesn’t give me much “me” time but you know what I’d rather have no “me” time then no sleep time because that way she’ll sleep till 8am…otherwise she’ll wake up at 6am if I put her to bed at 6/7/8pm. LOL
I miss those days but I don’t necessarily want those days …it’s different…I’m kinda happy with the busy work…keeps my mind from wandering about useless issues that I use to think/whine/complain about.
The things in this house …I swear it just keeps multiplying…all this baby stuff…and I’ve returned a lot of the big bulky stuff too! Oh geeze…it’s just going to get worse. I hope next year we can find a bigger place for baby. I hope and pray God can find us a good affordable place. It’s so expensive here. I would move further south but I just need seasons…I can’t live without it…it’s so depressing. It’s been so hot this winter. I wonder if it’s going to get colder. I guess I should go clean…the house is just screaming “clean me”.
When she sleeps I literally have to pick and choose what I want to do. Rest, clean or just do a fun activity like writing. Oh geeze…what I miss is reading! I loved curling up with an awesome book and just read. I can do that for hours….praying that I can better time manage.